The Reluctance to Attend a Bereavement Support Group

Barbara Karnes, RN

We tend to be unprepared for dying and death and we are unprepared for grief. Most of us don’t understand mourning, its natural flow, all the feelings and emotions that grieving presents. We are numb, we are screaming inside, we are confused, we are lost, we are alone, isolated, angry, afraid---all a normal parts of grieving. The thing is, most of us don’t know that all of what I just mentioned is normal and natural. It is grief but in our pain we think there must be something wrong with us, we are the ones out of step, we are not normal.

This is where bereavement support groups come in. Support groups are for anyone experiencing a death. The groups are not for just those people having challenges in dealing with their loss but for any and everyone who has lost someone close to them, or not so close to them. Bereavement support groups offer guidance to understanding that there is a normal pattern of grief and gives support and a place to verbalize as the feelings unfold. It is a place where those who have walked in the same shoes can gather and find strength to continue the walk.

Hospices are mandated by Medicare to offer bereavement support groups. Churches often offer grief support groups as part of their community outreach. This support can be found in almost any community. The problem is that bereavement groups tend not to be attended. 

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